Thursday, March 30, 2017

1st Grade Love Notes

Everett is growing up...


But WAY faster in ways that I'm not prepared for. 

We haven't ordered school portraits of Everett (because I take enough pictures) but we have gotten a class picture for him. Last year it was the typical standing-on-risers/teacher-on-the-side type of class picture. 

Then he brings this picture home a few days ago:

I was the only one standing in the kitchen when I saw it. It's the WORST class picture I've ever seen! I couldn't believe it! I just feel like it looks awful... and then I saw Everett (far left/hands in pockets). 

Then I said something that got me into hours of explaining and backtracking. 

I said that it was the most awful class picture I'd ever seen. I didn't say it to him or anyone else. I just said it out loud for no one to hear. 

Everett hadn't even looked at it yet and came to take a look. He looked at it and then saw himself and then ran to the couch and cried. 

I felt awful. 

Jake asked what happened and then Everett said "Mom said I looked awful" 

I had to explain to Jake and Everett my comment and why I said it and how I DID NOT say HE looked awful. 

Everett has no idea what a "normal" class picture looks like so he had nothing to base my comment off of. It was the backdrop, arrangement of kids, the lack of risers, the teacher in the middle, the flash/shadow behind Everett, it looks like there is a white fluffy cat in the picture, etc. 

It was dumb to say. Super dumb because it doesn't even matter but it came out of my mouth and I paid dearly for my insensitive comment. 

But then I realized that Everett is starting to be at the age where he cares what people think of him and he's aware of how he looks. 

We've arrived at the age of insecurities and it will probably get much worse before it gets better. 

A few day prior to the class picture he had a "love note" in his backpack. 

I only saw the purple star side. It was sitting on his dresser. He told me not to look at the other side. 

I told him I wouldn't and then I asked if it was a love note. 

He said yes and got that goofy, guilty smile. 

It was adorable. I just had to look at the other side! I waited a few days just so I felt like I was honoring his request :)

Everett is so sweet and nice to everyone and is bound to have many love notes in the future. This may be the best drawing ever though!

(*Update- he said I could look at the other side the next evening :)

I know that these two experiences are the very tip of the iceberg but it was a good learning experience for me to realize how important it is for me to watch what I say and how if affects my kids. And then in 10 years when he reads this he'll be mad at me again for documenting the cutest love note... but I'm not sorry about it 😄

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